Letting Go

You hear a lot of distressing comments by church members as a minister.  Over the decades I've borne witness to countless defenses of personal sin, I've listened to couples explain why their marriage just can't work, I'be been on the receiving end of harsh blasts of criticism, I've listened to members describe their anger in terms that would make a sailor blush, I've counseled with some who shared their deepest hidden sins.

However, perhaps the most distressing thing I've heard members of the church say ha been, "I just can't forgive..."  Or its second cousin, "I can forgive but I'll never forget."  What both of these disclaimers mean at their core is, "I just can't let go of..."

Not to forgive mean to keep giving value to an offense.  It means to consider something negative so valuable as to continue carrying it long after the offense, it is a means of continuing to give life to or to resuscitate a personal injury from the past.  To suggest that you forgive but do not forget isn't usually a statement of cerebral fact that getting over doesn't include developing amnesia.  It is to suggest that while you give lip service to forgiveness, you keep your teeth sunk into the offense.

This hanging on to the offense of another is to hang on to the sin in your own heart.  Sins of hatred, evil thoughts, desire for revenge, rejecting the way of love, setting barriers to reconciliation, obstructing redemption and rejecting personal forgiveness for your own sins.  Wait!  What?  My sin?  It wasn't my sin, it was his, her's, their's.

No, their sin is between them and God.  This sin of refusing to forgive is yours.  It is built upon their past sin but it is your current, ongoing sin.  And, this sin's consequence is far worse than whatever sin they were guilty of in offending or injuring you because you survived that sin while you are not surviving this one.  This sin you are carrying daily and it could carrying you into eternal separation from God and everything good and holy.  Their sin occurred in a moment in time, yours is a movement of time and perhaps eternity.

Listen to the warning of our Lord Jesus Christ: "For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.  But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins" (Matt 6:14-15).  Did you hear that, really hear it?  Your sin of refusing to forgive another includes the choice of refusing God's grace.  Their slight, however great it's impact, pales in comparison to your clinging to the anger and hatred fomented within your heart.

Don't.  Don't let the offense of another occupy a space in your heart and mind for free.  Raise the rent and kick it out.  Get the help of the Holy Spirit to evict the sin in your heart.  Let go and let God.  Jus' Say'n.