When I was a youth, we were merciless in our put downs of one another. We didn't do it out of hatred or anger but rather it demonstrated a kind of acceptance. We rather enjoyed the sharp-pointed jabbing. My mother, however, did not enjoy or approve of it in the least. I can still hear her word on the matter: "If you can't find something nice to say, don't say anything at all."
She was right, of course. Her words were tempered with the godly desire to enrich and build up rather than expose and put down. Her words were filled with God Speak as opposed to human slander. While humans tend to revel in a bit of gossip or some juicy tid-bit that pulls another down, God's view of words is totally different:
"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen" (Eph 4:29). God, warning that words have power to build up or tear down, insists that we are careful to build - this is God Speak.
Even when said in jest, there is danger of wounding one who is at a fragile place or someone with self-esteem issues to begin with. We must take great care when choosing words. It's not that we can never joke but that we must be very careful as to who is the butt of our joking and what is the root of the joke. On the whole, put downs are not good choices, even self-depreciation can be dangerous.
Answer? Use jesting with caution. Make sure the spirit behind it is not malevolent. Be sure the object of the jest has a solid grasp of his/her self-worth. Make it your aim to bless, not curse with words. Be intent on God Speak, which builds up rather than worldly words that tear down. Jus' Sayn.
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