Some people in our circle of friends, family and acquaintences simply annoy us to death. Some are downright offensive. Our response to that angst is typically polar, meaning we generally run to one extreme or the other in dealing with them.
One the one hand, there are people like me who loathe to create conflict and prefer to keep it to themselves, turning a blind eye to the behavior (which is to say that should I confront you with your behavior, I've had it up to my eyeballs). Others, like an old friend of mine now passed, will stop strangers on the streets to chew them out over pedestrian behavior.
What the Bible actually calls us to is something inbetween. Paul warns us "not to let the sun go down on our anger, giving the devil a foothold" (Eph 4:26, 27) and not to "grieve the Holy Spirit with bitterness and anger but instead be kind and compassionate, forgiving one another" (Eph 4:30-32). Jesus made "a whip out of cords, and drove all from the temple" (Jn 2:15). It would seem obvious there are two sides to this coin or a tension between perseverence and proactive engagement.
I think the balance is found in "speaking the truth in love" (Eph 4:15), where we exercise perseverence to a point and then, with the best interest of the other in heart, confront them with their offense, clearly stating their hurtful and unacceptable behavior with a desire to see them not only change their ways but to change their relationship with the Lord, to move closer to the heart of God and in so doing make them easier to live with and helping them enjoy the "abundant life" (Jn 10:10) Jesus came to offer.
Is being frank and not giving the devil a foothold easy to pull off? Not for me, but in Christ it is possible and therefore ought to be our goal as we seek to be his followers. Jus' Sayn.
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