Expectations

If you don't get a million dollars deposited in your checking account next week, will you be disappointed?  Probably not because you have no expectation of anyone depositing that amount.  But what if your paycheck is not deposited in your account?  In that case, "Heads will roll!"  Why?  Because you fully expect your paycheck to show up in place, on time and for the right amount.

Expectations play a larger role on our reactions than the actual action or event.  A million dollars would be better but we're only expecting our paycheck so we are not disappointed when we don't get a million bucks.

If you sat down at a restaurant and was served a perfectly cooked and prepared hamburger, would you be happy with it?  Depends.  If you were expecting lobster, there is not a chef in the world that could make your hamburger good enough.  If you were expecting a plain hotdog and a gourmet hamburger with all the trimmings came instead - well now, that's a different story!

This is one of the greater problems in relationships.  Wives expect things from their husbands that aren't being provided, husband want from their wives things that they aren't considering, parents want performance levels displayed in their children that aren't being achieved, bosses are insisting on outcomes that employees...  Get the picture?

In the church, we expect other Christians to behave in certain ways, live up to certain standards that we hold and hold over them in expectation.  When they don't act or talk or react in a manner that meets that expectation, we are disappointed with them and sometimes deem them unworthy.  Our expectations determine our reactions.

Sometimes there is a clear case of someone failing to keep biblical standards by lying, stealing, adultery, etc.  We do have to deal with those failures.  However, many times we are judging levels of commitment or amounts of giving or length of hair and so forth.  We are judging others based on our expectation of what we deem acceptable.

We need to approach expectations with great care because Jesus plainly says, "Do not judge, or you too will be judge.  For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the same measure you use, it will be measured to you" (Matt 7:1-2).

I'm not saying we should not evaluate what people do, for Jesus goes on to say in verses 15-20 that we are to inspect the fruit people bear.  What I am saying is that we need to be very careful and err on the side of grace not judgement.  Be sure your expectations are biblical standards and not personal standards.  Consider whether the other is up to the standard by which you are forming expectations.  Just be careful and grace-filled in your expectations.  Jus' Say'n.