Relationships are hard work. The divorce rate among first marriages is 41% and it gets worse in subsequent marriages (60% in 2nd marriages and 73% in 3rd attempts). It seems what was missing that caused the 1st divorce is still there in in future attempts.
With all the books on marriage, relationship seminars, marriage counseling and pre-marital training, one would think that we would be more than equipped to make a marriage last a lifetime, but there is no denying the numbers: 4 out of 10 original marriages fail and most do not learn from their failure as 6 out 10 next attempts fail and 7 out of 10 on the following round. What is missing?
All the professional relationship-building and/or mending advice notwithstanding, I think it comes down to one factor being missing in the marriage by one or both parties in the relationship: The Christ Factor.
When couples love each other in the way Christ loves others, divorce does not even appear on the horizon, let alone become the path taken. When this simple factor is at work in a marriage, a marriage simply works. So what is this factor? I'm glad you asked.
It is found in Philippians 2:5 and what is revealed is this: "In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus," which was to "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves..." (v. 3).
Reminds me a lot of the "Golden Rule" found in Matthew 7:12 and the "Royal Law" of James 2:8, both of which are given by Christ and focus on the good of the other.
The Christ Factor, factors out selfishness, which is the root cause of divorce and the breakdown of relationships in general. When we, like Christ, give sacrificially, relationships are redeemed. Jus' Sayn.
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